dirty mirror

dirty mirror, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

under the weather

how does one feel under the weather. I mean, really…can I be feeling under 3 inches of snow? under 17 degrees? and if you’re feeling great, why wouldn’t one say, ‘i’m feeling a little over the weather today’? whatever the case, i’m feeling under 17 degrees today. echinacea, orange juice and kleenex are my new best friends. i hope this clears up soon since we have a lot going on this weekend and i'm sick of losing money. no sick days for freelancers...

10:00 on saturday night

and i'm seriously debating going to bed. and reading some more of my book. and getting up early to go to the gym. and coordinating an outfit for church to specifically match my new green ($5!) heels. thanks a lot jen, for planting that seed in my head. anyway, when did it happen? you know, the slow transition from hanging out saturday night at the movies or with friends downtown sipping overpriced coffee and listening to free live music to, all of a sudden, spending your night washing clothes and brushing your teeth at 10 pm.

dear nobody cares enough to care

so, if any of you don’t know the ongoing saga that is my husband’s career, i’ll fill you in.

my husband’s job sucks. They pay well but they run your life. so far, things like buying a car, getting a dog and having children have been put off for this job. he travels a lot. we’re expected to move every three to four years just for the hell of it. just because, making friends and becoming settled is a bad thing, in case you all thought that was the normal pattern of life.

in november we were informed we had to choose between three cities to relocate to, OR possibly be forced to go wherever the crap they wanted to put us and with detroit in the mix, we weren't about to risk it. we spent an entire weekend (that’s all they gave us to decide, nice, right) trying to figure out if we wanted to live in los angeles or new york city. after many phonecalls, hours online checking out housing prices and locations, and several pro/con lists, we finally decided to go for the sunshine and move to los angeles.

yeah well, too bad for us, they said we might find out before christmas. And then we would find out by the end of february. today we find out that IF we actually do have to move, it won’t happen until at least this summer. seriously. i feel like buying a teddy bear just so I can rip it’s eyes off while i stare out into the doom and gloom and gray matter that is upstate new york.

gosh already

so this morning i opted for a few more minutes with brad pitt instead of actually waking up and getting ready for work. now i’m stuck here until 6:30. it’s quiet and dark, and i’m bored. oh, i can see the guy in the cubicle next to me perfectly in the reflection of the windows. i wonder if he’ll pick his nose? looks like he’s just working. boring.

i've been dissapointed with the weather lately. no chance to take any good photos, except while i'm at work. the sun shines in my face mocking me. then the weekend comes and he disappears without a trace. i need a vacation somewhere warm and sunny so i can take georgeous pictures and post them all over my office when i feel like i do today.

happy almost-friday everyone. it's almost-payday!

these are a few of my favorite things

i love mail, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

my cousin sent the 'fun box'. finally. we have this tradition sort of. we send boxes back and forth filled with fun stuff that we spent weeks collecting. from a packet of sugar to a splendid new purse to a hand-me-down t-shirt. this one even included a postcard of a hollywood real estate personality with a couple of lap dogs in a shopping cart. strange.

anyway, here are a few of my favorite items. the butterfly adorned playing cards, a girl's poker playing necessity, a JET promo CD, cause i'm too cheap to buy the real one, and some felt covered stationary, because i can't get enough of decorated paper.

self-portrait tuesday #3 - all of me

self-portrait tuesday, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

welcome to my awkward stage. this is me and my then best friend jared. we had just hiked to the top of some mountain in some state somewhere. i had a crush on him my entire childhood. i love that he has that petruding little belly. it almost makes him look like one of those etheopian children with rail thin arms and little bloated bellies.

i still have the big nose and the flat chest, but at least i ditched the oversized pink sweatshirt and the scrunchies.

it's all relevant to no one

what a grand weekend. busy, but grand. i didn’t cook all weekend, unless you count breakfast, but really, how difficult is it to cook frozen turkey links?

highlights of the weekend include: no cooking (of course), a new camera, a ten dollar cashmere sweater, 'in her shoes', starting a new book, sleeping until 11am.

downsides of the weekend: it’s over.

i'm a terrible daughter.

i wouldn't adopt myself if i had the option.

it's 11pm saturday night. saturday the 18th. the 18th. of february. february 18th? why does that ring a bell? the 18th. wait. the 17th. february the 17th. yes, that's it. that is my mother's birthday. did i call her? no. did i send her an e-card? no. am i a bad daughter? yes.

mom. i forgot your birthday, yet again. and it's 11pm and you're staying with relatives with small children, soo...i can't call you. and if by chance you read this before i call you, i'm sorry. and oh yeah, happy birthday.

love,
your awful, teeny-size brained daughter.

the new canon performs

me_small.jpg, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

so good, you wouldn't even notice i was having a bad hair day.

lazy daize

chair.jpg, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

the official first photo with my new camera. i'm in love. with the camera, not the chair. although i like that pillow a lot.

the short bus

why is it that when life is slow, your mind is speeding, and when life is fast, your mind is slow? my mind is like 3 laps behind my life this week.

The happiest valentine’s day of all:

so i came home to an electronic card and a jpg image of what i actually got for dreaded v-day. my husband even tried to design a card in Illustrator, which made it all the more exciting for me. and i have to note here, that he said it better than hallmark ever could. and my gift, well, my gift is amazing. he bought me the canon digital 20D which is a level above the camera i was looking to invest in. it’s an 8.2 megapixel digital dream. I’m thinking of selling prints of my photos online. so heather, I’m totally ready to start shooting endless pictures of your new baby, hurry up and have it already. The camera gets here friday, do you think you can deliver by then?

self-portrait tuesday: all of me

all of me, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

so i tried to think about the ugly in me, since that's the assignment (which i failed to notice until after posting last week's picture). and since having the husband snap shots of me while i rage around the bedroom in a pms rant doesn't seem like a good idea even now in all my pms-soberness, i decided to go another route. so here it is. this is my big hairy nasty wart, dead smack in the middle of my forehead: i love to shop.

it's an addiction really. i AM a shopoholic. and i thought it was a made-up illness. you know, like when the doctors keep prodding and poking and they never find out what exactly it is that ails you, so they make up a name and call it a day. well, it's real. and i have it. and post-Christmas is the worst time to be what i am. it's ugly. my wardrobe is gorgeous, but my bank account is ugly. this is me. all seventy-three dollars and fifty-two cents of me.

see other much more brave or soul-bearing self-portraits here.

distant memories

nature, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

of anything other than snow.

i have a secret

i'm hoping that my husband gets me that nifty new camera for valentines day. it's a big hope, because normally he 'thinks' of all these great things he's going to get me for certain occasions, say, my birthday or christmas, but waits until it's too late to actually get anything. and then i'm stuck with nothing. except a pair of black socks.

betty davis, we love you

I surprise myself sometimes. Apparently, I know every single word to madonna’s “vogue” (I am well aware that I’m admitting to you how much I loved that song at some point in my life). You guys know this isn’t an easy song to remember, especially when you get to the end and she’s just listing off famous OLD people and how they danced on air. It came on this morning on my way to work and I sang my heart out. Yes, I vogued, shamelessly.

she says 'fart'.

Lastnight, I actually thought about putting chocolate chips on my salad. Let me explain: My husband and I have been doing this ‘thing’ the last couple of weeks. It’s not a diet, but we’ve cut all breads, wheat and grains out of our daily food consumption. We eat meat, fruits and vegetables. Mostly. We tend to cheat. A dark chocolate candy bar here, a bowl of granola cereal there. (We allow ourselves one thing a day so it better be worth it.) We even had turkey burgers the other night sans bread. We wrapped them in lettuce. It was good. Seriously.

So why are we doing this? Well, the husband was hoping to lose a couple of pounds and I was just hoping to cleanse, more or less. (Feeling like I need to drag myself through every mundane task of my day is draining and sad at 28.) Last time we did this it was over a weekend and there was no meat involved and I was starving and weak, and I think my stomach ate a portion of itself, quiet literally. So this time, I wasn’t looking forward to a ‘cleanse’. I, however, have felt great. It’s amazing. We let ourselves cheat all day on Superbowl Sunday and by that evening we were keeling over, letting out disgusting room-clearing farts, and burping uncontrollably. Our stomachs were in protest of the fried chicken, brownies, cupcakes, chips and dips, and calzones. It’s really incredible the difference you feel, which is why I’m still avoiding the animal crackers and cookies with ease.

And the turkey burger thing is awesome. I’m so serious. I dare you to try it.

burried in the white stuff i love

since i tend to be cynical and dreary, i thought i would shake things up a bit.
so, internet, i present the things i love today:
• light fluffy snow
• hot cocoa
• a day off from the gym
• pedestrians bundled up & hurrying through the streets
• the view from my office
• my to do list
• my oversized sweater
• 'love monkey'

self portrait tuesday #1!

selfinwall.jpg, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

this is me. i'm a photographer. i'm not great, but i'm not bad. i see things that other people walk right past. i see the world in a constant viewfinder. it's a blessing and a curse. i have nightmares about visiting the corners of the earth and forgetting my camera. i have hundreds of pictures that never get printed. but every time i look back at the images of my life, i remember exactly what i was feeling at that moment and it all seems worth never forgetting my camera.

see others self-portraits here.

I love all things sweater.

While my husband was busy losing a few poker games, I was out finding excellent deals on clothes I didn’t need. I bought 3 sweaters and a pair of jeans. One of the sweaters I’ve had my eye on, but last time I was there they didn’t have my size. Well this time they did, and it was on sale for 6 bucks. Score. The jeans were ten. Double score. There are some benefits to being a size tiny.

conversationalism

ME: i thought i'ld finally call you back. i'm on my way to bible study

Anonymous Friend: wait, you go to bible study?

ME: yeah, why, you thought i was going to hell?

AF: yep. in a handbasket.

ME: a handbasket must be awful small.

AF: yeah, but you'ld fit.

roses are pink

roses are pink, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

i bought these for 4 dollars. they were dying in the grocery store, sad, lonely and rejected. so i brought them home to die in my happy, warm house. i'm like a hospice for vegetation.

take that MB

cd_cover.jpg, originally uploaded by tinkerellen.

my CD cover designed especially for my CD recipient. although it didn't print this nice because my printer is on the fritze. just imagine more purple than blue.

the state of my union

i actually watched half of the speech lastnight. half! that's a new record for me since i've never watched a state of the union, ever. why do we have to have an entire night devoted to talking about everything we all already know anyway? and on the same night as Scrubs? for shame.

so my hair is totally shagadelic. i need a haircut. bad. i look like a dishevelled wildebeast. not that they ever look shevelled. is that even a word. who cares. so it looks fine from the front, i can control it now that my sideburns are finally long enough to tuck behind me ears instead of curling straight out from my face. that does so annoy me. but the back. the back is horrendous. it's so bad, that if i were to pass you on the street and we were the best of friends, you would still whisper about how disgusting my hair looked as i walked away. and you'ld have the right. who here has ever tried to grow their hair out and actually succeeded? usually i get to that point where things start getting in my eyes and crawling down my neck and i rush to the stylist and have her buzz my head. but that's not happening this time. IF we go to LA, i plan to spend tons of time at the beach. my current pixie style is cute and lovely and an easy do, but it reacts to the beach like cats to big scary dogs. i need something longer and easy to pull behind my ears, wet or dry. so. it's growing. and growing. and fast. which is both good and really really annoying. especially since my amazing stylist, whom i love enough to pay an outrageous amount of money for a simple haircut, is booked for two weeks. two weeks!

'i'm annoyed with my hair. the end.'
that would have made a much shorter post.